Everyone knows that one person who is always “keeping score.” He or she may say “I forgive you” but what is really meant is “I forgive you but I’m not forgetting this.” This adolescent clinging to old injuries is not how God means for us to live.
Yes, God set forth the 10 Commandments. And through His Church, He does guide his flock by teaching what kinds of actions are objectively wrong. However, it us not up to us to decide and judge the soul of the person who does fall into sin. We all fall into sin. Rather, we are called at all times to entrust ourselves and others to God’s infinite mercy.
To those who “keep score,” what did Jesus mean when he responded to Peter’s question asking how many times he must forgive his brother? Jesus said, “I say to you, not seven times but seventy-seven times” (Matthew 18:22). What does Jesus mean when he said, “If you bring your gift to the altar, and there recall that your brother has anything against you, leave your gift there at the altar, go first and be reconciled with your brother, and then come and offer your gift” (Matthew 5:23—24)?
Saint Faustina, a Polish nun, received the message of Divine Mercy from Jesus. He appeared to her and said, “Before I come as a just Judge, I first open wide the doors of My mercy” (1146).
Jesus Himself wishes to stay His Justice, and it is upon Him that we must model ourselves. How dare we approach His infinite mercy, while we ourselves refuse mercy to others, excusing ourselves because we deemed some petty old dispute undeserving of our forgiveness?
The very prayer that Jesus taught us says, “Forgive us our trespasses….as we forgive those who trespass against us.” Every time we say this prayer, we ask God to forgive as often as we forgive, or—sadly—to be as harsh with us as we are with others.
Often those who “keep score” so meticulously well for everyone else around them do a very bad job holding themselves accountable. To the “scorekeepers” out there, I can assure you that God in His infinite wisdom could do a far better job at assessing your life than you do, but does He? No, look at the parable of the Prodigal Son, that mirrors the relationship between God and man. The younger of two sons squanders his inheritance, only to realize his wrongdoing, and sets out to tell his father that he sinned against him. So, the son returns to his father, hoping at least to become a hired hand. The father sees his son returning from a distance and runs to him, having his servants bring his son a robe, ring, and sandals and kill the fattened calf (Luke 15:11—32).
The father did not cast the son’s sins in his face, or whip out a tally sheet. Instead, the father embraced his repentant son with mercy. Similarly, God embraces us with His mercy, but it is infinitely greater.
Saint Faustina conveyed the words of Jesus Himself to those who insist on keeping score and refusing mercy. Jesus said, “He who refuses to pass through the doors of My mercy must pass through the doors of My justice” (1146).
